At this point, I had been connected with a private psychologist in Burlington to continue working on issues related to anxiety, perfectionism, depression and my eating disorder. I felt guilty because I knew my parents had to pay for it, but also felt like I really needed the support. I was living in a student house where I was now in charge of making all of my own meals. I liked my roommates, but early on there was drama in the house. Two of my roommates who had been dating had broken up, and it was not a nice break up. The guy then started flirting with the other girl in the house, a first year life science student going through her own struggles.
Meanwhile, I was thrown into a new program with no friends. Within the first few weeks it seemed that everyone already had their clique of friends. I felt stressed, lonely, and isolated. School was also much harder (even though I didn’t have organic chemistry). All of the information in my courses was brand new, whereas in first year a lot of it was review from high school. I did my best to support the struggling first year in my house, and still struggled with food. I wanted to lose a little bit of weight, not a drastic amount, but a bit. I still struggled to find time to exercise. I also had my bike stolen while writing a midterm one night, that was a rough time. I also made the decision to try to make a friend in my program.
One girl in my program also happened to be in my biology tutorial, and her name was Brianne. I’d met her in first year because we were in the same residence, but thought that she didn’t like me at the time. She also hung out with some pretty wild people. One day in tutorial we were picking groups for a project, but she was late. We’d chatted a bit before, and I didn’t want her to have to be alone, so I put her in my group. We talked more since we were working on the same project, and she seemed like a nice person. During exam season I asked her if she wanted to study with me at the library, and luckily she said yes. Her boyfriend at the time also happened to be in our program, so I wasn’t sure if she was open to me third wheeling, but I was grateful to have a friend.
Despite consistently freaking out about school all semester, I managed to still do well. I enjoyed the holiday break, and jumped into second semester.
A Mind Warrior 